The Possible Self ‘Self-Esteem & Kindness’

This morning the sun is glistening on the Mediterranean and the eastern winds blow………

It’s my sixth day without coffee.  At the weekend I made coffee for guests.  Yes, my pot, my coffee!  It was delightful to actually go through the ritual in making it and see the pleasure it gave my guests.  I had no serious urge to partake and that was in itself amusing.  I just love the aroma.   I do have the odd head ache and that I understand is withdrawal symptoms.  I have been drinking herb teas for as long as I can remember, and none appeal to me in the morning, maybe I could try something totally new.  One reader from the west of Ireland emailed me and suggested I check out who won the equivalent to the Oscars in herb tea awards in London last year.  I shall call them this afternoon and report back………

On Friday last,  I listed some attributes that help us to build self-esteem.
Kindness was first on the list.  I will blog for this week about Kindness.  The definition for kindness in the Oxford dictionary: the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.  Kindness is a response in ourselves to what we become aware of in our daily life that provokes us into action, sometimes unconsciously and other times very consciously towards another:

  • smiling when you are about your day,  it effects the world around you;
  • seeing that a shopper has no hands free, you observe this and you hold the door open;
  • a young student has no lunch, you slip him/her your lunch without anyone noticing;
  • making a cup of tea for your colleague because s/he just had a tuff meeting;
  • sending a note to say well done to someone you do or don’t know;
  • is taking a lost dog home to its owner;
  • is putting money in the hat for a community endeavour;
  • is when you say nothing when the other person needs time to get it all out;
  • is cooking and delivering a meal to someone you know, or not, who is having a hard time or celebrating a very special occasion;
  • is putting food in a friends fridge, who is about to return home;
  • is not being snappy with the check out person in the store, when every one else’s is getting angry with the long queue;
  • is giving a neighbor a lift without making them feel they own you one;
  • is not saying your busy, when you could spare the time to listen and help another work out an issue, a choice to be made, etc;
  • give a homeless person the same crossant or other bakery delight you buy for yourself everyday;
  • say please and thank you to all who serve you and really mean it;
  • acknowledge the people you meet with a greeting e.g. good morning, good afternoon or good evening and mean it;
  • comment on a person who serves you, lives with you or works with you on how well they look (if they do);
  • forgive someone a debt and never bring it up again;
  • write an email to a friend or family member to say you love them, or your thinking of them, or just send a beautiful photo;
  • let a fellow driver into your lane, and do it with a smile;
  • if you know you created a bad atmosphere in your home, at work, or with a friend acknowledge it and say sorry;
  • pick up that plastic bag and bring it home to recycle, or drop it in an appropriate bin nearby, lead by example  -our natural environment needs us;
  • call or write to a person who has had a positive affect on your life;
  • encourage someone who is blue;
  • look in the mirror, smile at your own reflection a few times during the day, and support yourself by saying ‘I love you’ or ‘I am proud of what you have done today’;
  • try dropping the should’s and could’s from your vocabulary and replace them with e.g. I can choose to or I would like to;
  • empty the dish washer without being asked to do so;
  • make dinner not because its your turn, because it would give you lots of joy to do so;

Generally,  everyone we meet is a friend, colleague, sister, brother, niece, nephew, mother, father, grandparent, uncle, aunt of someone else.
How would you like your family and friends to be treated?
How would you like to be treated in public and in private?
Its the small acts of kindness that give us the pleasure of our own humanity.  Think for a minute about the people you love or you say you love, the people who serve you everyday in shops, cafe’s, restaurants, newspaper stands, on trains, buses, planes and boats, in libraries, in emails, colleges and the workplace.

What would you like to do in your daily routine to make their day a better day, by a simple gesture of kindness from you?  We all play a part in everyone else’s story everyday!
How can you be kind to yourself and others today?
Your possible self knows how!

“A fellow who does things that count, doesn’t usually stop to count them”.
Variation of a saying by Albert Einstein

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see”.  Mark Twain

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