It’s a very spring like day today on the French Riviera. It’s getting warmer and the days are lengthening. Birds have been chirping since 6.30am; sweet sounds which seem to be from very small birds. Strange thing is I never see them fly about. They are hidden in the trees above my terrace. And a boat is heading out to sea. They have told the harbour master where they are going and when they will return. They are focused and on purpose.
I am on purpose too when it comes to abstaining from coffee. I made it many times over the weekend for friends and family and I had no wish to break my resolve. My ‘monkey mind’ was babbling on about all the reasons to have one; it didn’t happen. It must be by 60th day without coffee. We can really do anything we put our minds to within human reason if we take the first step and follow through on our decisions because we chose to make changes that are good for us, nothing to do with anyone else. Coffee was making me ill so goodbye coffee. What works and does not work for you? What choices have you made and for what reason? Are they good choices for your health, mind and well being?
Are you focused on your ‘life plan’ today?
Which tasks will you start and which ones will you finish?
Is your ‘to do’ list getting shorter and shorter or longer and longer?
When I ask that question during a Possible Self program I generally get two answers:
- What ‘life plan’?
- Which ‘to do’ list?
When I ask if they ever had a ‘personal life plan’ to achieve various changes and developments in their life. The answer is “on and off and I never stick to my plans.”
When I ask how many times in a week/month/year they make a ‘to do’ list, lists that make them feel energized, full of hope, excited and enthused about the potential for their lives. The answer is generally “a lot and it lasts for a week or so, I forget about the list and make new ones over and over. The same stuff keeps on re-appearing.”
When I ask how well they fair in their workplace past and present making plans and achieving them. The answer generally is “almost always”.
When I asked why that is. The answer is, “I get great satisfaction doing a job/project well, it’s easier doing it for others, I get paid, I get acknowledgement and I get promoted on occasion. The motivation is different. I have a different value in the workplace”
When I ask what stops them taking control of, and or directing their personal lives in the same way as they do for others at work. The answer generally is down right laziness, self-doubt, lack of self-worth, fear of failure, a lack of self-motivation and that leads to procrastination.
Imagine that you have three coats you wear as you live your life;
1. one to work which gets ‘stuff’ done
2. one for your personal life which, doesn’t really get ‘the stuff’ done
3. one for the life you imagine and is possible to achieve.
How does it feel to wear each one in turn and how are they different? How do they affect your self-worth, motivation and sense of self?
Which one would you like to wear today? Why?
We have explored fear in a previous week, and know there is fear that is necessary for our survival and safety. And there is fear that helps us to really thrive ‘feel the fear and do it anyway kinda attitude’. Procrastination; the place between intention and action, is the place where too many people dwell. Stuck by in-action. It’s the place where you don’t turn up in your own life. It’s the place that stops you from being there for you to activate your personal plans.
All the selves are there waiting in the wings to be on purpose about your plans, but the ‘director-self’ got distracted; checking his or her email, skyping and chatting to friends, browsing the net, looking at pornography, eating and drinking too much, taking substances that dull the feeling of fear and procrastination, moving stuff form one place to another and back again, too busy making plans about plans, reading books, watching films, documentaries about people who have achieved their greatness, watching sports etc; being the spectator to everyone else’s life and not getting to know and develop their own life. Why? Why be a hero/heroine in the public/work life and not in the personal life? We sabotage our own intentions and keep on doing it until it manifests itself in illness of the mind or body and our spiritual glow weakens. Time passes and next year we are in the same place again.
BUT HEY…IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THAT WAY. YOU ARE WORTH THE EFFORT EVERY TIME. Your stage is always set; the lights are always on waiting for you to turn up in your own life. So long as you have breath and can wear your smile, so long as you can laugh at yourself and your situation, so long as you choose to be in process; to feeling and knowing self-love, self-kindness and self-determination, you can stop the self-deception and self-sabotage to achieve your own personal plans. You can have integrity and balance in your life and be the same person in both your public and private life. Like the boat that left the port this morning you will come and go on many journeys that will create an inner confidence to live your plans. Your plans are your intentions to enjoy and be excited about your life on planet earth, giving and receiving.
Choose to live all of your life! It’s now or never! The only time you have is the space between birth and death. What age are you? Your life is not a dress rehearsal. Take the first step today. ‘YOU’ are your own project. What is the one thing you want to achieve this week, month and or year? Begin that process today and keep on course day by day monitoring your process. Achieve one thing and that will give you the confidence to make other changes and or to improve what you already have. Be brave, be courageous do it because you told yourself you would do it. Aren’t you worth it?
Do it with a smile, it helps every time.
“A ship is always safe at the shore – but that is NOT what it is built for.” Albert Einstein
“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” Napoleon Hill
“Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” Benjamin Franklin
“Love like you’ll never be hurt,
Sing like there’s nobody listening,
And live like it’s heaven on earth.” William P. Purkey
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” John Lennon
“Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.” Frank Zappa
“Never confuse movement with action.” Ernest Hemingway
©Copyright The Possible Self 2012